Please consider the following:
- Speaking with the student individually
- Filling out a STARs referral
Show you care, connect on a feeling level, listen.
- “I’m concerned about you and noticed you haven’t been sleeping, eating, going to class, etc.”
- “How are you feeling?”
- Reflect back their feelings and paraphrase: “What I hear you saying is that you are in a great deal of pain and feel hopeless.”
- “I’m glad you are speaking with me.”
- Listen with respect. Individuals in distress want understanding and care.
Ask about suicide directly.
- “Sometimes when people feel sad, they have thoughts of hurting or killing themselves. Have you had such thoughts?”
- “Are you thinking of killing yourself?”
- “Have you considered suicide?” “Do you have a plan?”
- Remember, asking about suicide does NOT put the idea in people’s minds.
- If a student answers that they are suicidal, or you are concerned that they may be, you MUST call the UMass Lowell Police Department (UMLPD) for a wellness check. You should not solely rely on emailing any STARS member or solely completing the STARS referral form for immediate action.
Get help. Explore options. Offer resources.
- “What would help now?” “Who can help, who usually helps?” “How can I help?”
- Get assistance. Avoid trying to be the only lifeline for this person. Seek out resources even if it means breaking a confidence.
- “How would you feel about going to Counseling Services? Let’s call right now."
- Complete the STARS referral form and let the student know you are doing so in order to secure assistance for them.
- Call extension 44-911 on campus or 978-934-4911 if this is an acute crisis. The EMTs and University Police will respond immediately.
What Not To Do
- Do not promise to keep the person’s thoughts of self-harm / suicide confidential.
- Do not leave the person alone in cases of potential suicidal thoughts, or if the student is in crisis.
- Do not offer simple solutions.
- Do not dismiss their feeling or concerns.